1 on 1 Peer Support
If polyamory makes sense in theory, but you struggle to juggle the time and commitments of parenting and relationships in practice, 1 on 1 peer support is for you.
Kids need a lot, often unpredictably, sometimes with inconvenient timing. Dating and building relationships requires time, energy, and emotional space. Taking care of yourself, well… a lot of us really never learned to even consider our own needs. For many families I work with, add in layers of intense, high needs and/or neurodivergent children and parents. Parents with trauma histories. Big life changes like parents divorcing or de-escalating, and uncertainty about the world and the future. It’s easy to feel like this is just how it is.
My clients tend to…
Feel like there’s never enough time and energy to go around between partners, parenting, responsibilities, and themselves. Their energy is spread thin, and no matter what they choose something or someone gets neglected.
Feel guilty about not giving enough time and attention to kids or partners and they fear their choices will cause harm to their kids. They’re losing their minds trying to be present everywhere at once.
Struggle to find deep, meaningful connections with partners that understand their commitments. Parenting takes so much emotional labor, and it leaves them with no time for dating or with only casual relationships that don’t feel fulfilling.
You’re in the right place if you want to…
Show up fully for everyone you care about- kids, partners, and yourself, and balance everyone’s needs while still tending to your own.
Model healthy relationships for your kids- showing them love, care, and boundaries in action.
Clearly communicate your needs without guilt and stick to them.
Find deep, connected relationships with the right partners that fit your already crowded life and understand your commitments.
Let go of traditional scripts around parenting roles and know you’re being a good parent.
You’ve probably already tried shared calendars, setting schedules (that never last because things always come up with kids), getting more organized (but life always gets in the way of keeping up with it) and asking partners to help with kids. Maybe you’ve read the poly books, or listened to the podcasts, worked with a poly friendly therapist or coach, and done a lot of self reflection about your expectations about parenting and relationships. You’ve likely even learned to admit it when you’re overwhelmed, given yourself permission to say no, allowed it to be imperfect, and you’re still just not finding the fulfillment in polyamory and parenting that you imagined.
It is hard.
The things you’ve tried can be helpful sometimes, but they’re missing some key pieces of the puzzle.
Scheduling and organization miss your internal experience. They can’t be responsive to changing needs or energy levels, and they can be too focused on what other people want while neglecting yourself. Learning and reading are great for intellectual understanding, but that doesn’t always translate into practical application in your actual everyday life. Letting go and acknowledging your limitations is important, and it can lead to resentment when you let go of things that are important to you.
Here’s the truth:
Building a life that really works for you AND the people you love has to start with you.
That might sound selfish, but I promise I’m not suggesting you neglect your kids or partners! Many of us never learned to see anything between self sacrifice and selfishness. We never learned how to hold you AND me at the same time. We never learned how to find win-win solutions that work for everyone, and especially not when we’re holding the needs of multiple people at the same time!
This isn’t just a pretty theory.
We dig into practical exercises and tools that help you understand yourself, your needs, your values, and your priorities.
We work step by step through how to navigate the complexity of competing demands on your time and energy.
We get deeply in touch with what really drives you, so that you feel confident that your decisions and choices come from that internal fire and not external “shoulds”.
We build systems of support that nourish instead of draining you.
We get into the details of your unique life and family instead of prescribing some one size fits all approach that doesn’t work for your humans.
Through it all, I hold you with compassion and I help you find the solutions that feel good to everyone- adults and children.
Hi, I’m Jen
I’m a queer, neurospicy, polyamorous parent with 10 years of experience supporting parents. I’m a Holistic Family Consultant and mediator, and I have a background in trauma informed bodywork, attachment theory, human development, and breastfeeding peer support. I bring a compassionate, playful, and insightful approach to helping families develop relationships that feel connected, joyful, and sustainable.
I help parents who care deeply about the well-being of their children and the quality of their relationships learn how to prioritize their own joy and needs without sacrificing the people they love.
What People Are Saying
“Jen has been a fabulous voice of compassion and reason during trying times. I appreciate their awareness of boundaries and relationship dynamics, their knowledge of actually helpful parenting advice - especially for those of us parenting small humans with special needs - and how they are able to see clearly to the heart of what really needs addressing in order to build truly resilient relationships. I also appreciate their gentle humor and considerate reflections when I am at my worst.”
— Jess, parent of 2, Colorado“Jen created a safe space for me when I don’t think I even knew that could exist. They have helped me reconnect with me and trust myself, they have been supportive for me to radically transform all of my relationships starting with myself. their understanding of the world and context make a big difference when it comes to healing. I feel like receiving and witnessing such compassion, kindness, and empathy has been incredibly healing. I can completely say my family has survived 3 country moves and a pandemic in three years thanks to Jen’s support and most of all their heart.”
— Natali, mom of 2, Mexico“Jen is very attentive, she is compassionate, and real. She will not sugar coat the truth. She will tell it like it is but in a kind way. She will help you stay focused on making visible progress on your goals.
I feel like my work with her has really helped me accept parts of myself that I used to be ashamed of. She has helped me find my voice and advocate for myself in a brand new way. If you are ready for substantial change in your life and in breaking the patterns that no longer serve you. I highly recommend working with her.”
— Christina, mom of 1, ColoradoHow we work together
Five 50 minute sessions 1 on 1
Weekly or every other week at a time that’s convenient for you
Customized pace, exercises, and homework for your unique situation and needs
Learn how to balance the needs of your important people without sacrificing yourself
Gain confidence and release guilt about your decisions and your parenting
Find space in your life to build meaningful and fulfilling connections
$500*
Schedule a free consult to make sure we’re a great fit
*see FAQ for information about sliding scale equitable access
FAQs
What is the sliding scale?
1
I am committed to making help as accessible as possible, both for financial need and equitable access for members of marginalized populations. The sliding scale application is included in the intake form for the free consultation and here. Applying for a reduced rate is completely optional, and all information disclosed in your application is completely confidential.
I already don’t have enough time, how am I supposed to make time for this?
2
I get it! Not feeling like you have enough time for everything that matters to you is the whole reason you’re here in the first place. That’s why the commitment is only 5 sessions- it’s a short time (5-10 weeks) to squeeze in some time to really focus on yourself, but it will pay dividends in how much better you feel about how you spend your time for a long, long time.
Are you really going to transform my whole life in 5 sessions?
3
Yes- and no. In my experience, one off sessions tend to be too sporadic to get any deeper than fighting fires, but after 5 sessions you’ll still need to practice and build your new skills. You’ll have new perspective and new tools, time to try them and get feedback to grow, and you’ll be ready to practice them in your everyday life and start to make meaningful changes.
How is this different from therapy?
4
I’m not a therapist, and I don’t offer any diagnosis or treatment. This is focused on concrete skills and action oriented shifts in your life. My specific expertise at the intersection of parenting and polyamory can be a great complement to individual or family therapy.
How is this different from the free community group?
5
I encourage all my 1 on 1 clients to also attend the community groups- building a sense of shared experience is important! The community group typically focuses on more basic questions and experience sharing, and the group format doesn’t allow the same vulnerability or deep dive into the specifics of your life and family.
Isn’t this just the reality if I have young or high needs kids?
6
It’s true that your experience with young or high needs kids will be different, and it may be intense. It’s NOT true that it requires you to sacrifice yourself or that you can’t prioritize any of your own needs. Modeling prioritizing yourself AND your children is actually really important for the health of their future relationships, as well as your well-being as a parent and a human, right now. Finding the seemingly impossible win-wins is my specialty.
You can have great relationships with your kids, meaningful connections with partners, and prioritize yourself too- without guilt or overwhelm.
Book a free consultation and let’s check whether we’re a good fit- no pressure, no sales tactics. Just a conversation about what’s hard for you and what I can offer